Recently I was knee deep, rather thigh deep in laundry. A series of events including strep throat for mom, an over night accident, guests from out of town and life aided in the backup in the laundry department. There it set in a huge pile on our bed one evening. A huge weight on my shoulders and a huge pang of guilt that I couldn't get it all done.
Out of my mouth, I heard myself utter three words to my husband, almost painful to say -- I need help.
I need help -- 3 painful words to say
He happily got to work helping and we were done folding laundry in about 20 minutes time. He didn't think a thing of it or point his finger at me and say failure. He was more than happy to pitch in, of course.
Why is it so hard for me to utter those three words -- I need help.
Somewhere along the way I got this notion, maybe you did too, that as
stay at home mom, mother, woman, we should be able to do all the things, be all the things to everybody, everywhere. We have high expectations and when our performance neither exceeds or even meets those expectations, we feel like we failed and have guilt.
As women we got the notion that we should be able to do all the things, be all the things to everybody, everywhere.
I feel like a failure when I admit I need help. Since adding blogging to my daily plate, I have felt this tension more frequently. You might say, "give up blogging" but that's not the root of the problem. The root is I want to be self-sufficient. I want to do it all.
I want to be self-sufficient. I want to do it all.
Is it the worst thing to have my kids put their own clothes away, empty the dishwasher, put the pillows back on the couch they placed on the ground to play Ninja Warrior? NO! There are things on my daily to do list and yours, we don't have to do.
Family life is all hands on deck to keep this ship sailing and pointed in the right direction.
Family life is a team sport. It's not mom does everything while everyone else watches from the sidelines. I can make it that way. Its really all hands on deck to keep the ship sailing and pointed in the right direction. It's calling people off the bench when you have fallen behind and you need support. Teaching our kids responsibility and pitching in will serve them well in this life.
Pride kept me from asking for help, humility brought me to a place of peace.
What have I learned from uttering those three difficult words is I do need help. I am not self-sufficient. The bible even tells us of our need for God, we can't do it on our own. Not our salvation, not this life. We need God and we need others. No one can do it all, even if it looks like they are on the outside.
I need help. We all do. We can't do it alone.
Happy Mother's Day to all those women out there who love and care for so many others every single day! May you know how much you do DO and how much you are loved today and everyday. Keep on, keeping on #tribekoko.
Labels: Encouragement, Faith